No More Mr. Nice Guy!

Taxing my patience

With today's column, E.J. Montini officially surrenders his status as one of the few voices of sanity in that talentless stable of tenth-rate partisan hacks fondly known as the Arizona Repulsive.

Montini writes:

Would Jesus Christ sport a "Yes We Can" Obama '08 button on his tunic? Or would the Prince of Peace prefer a "Country First" McCain T-shirt?

Your pastor might tell you at church today, shortly before he lets you know which political candidates deserve your vote.

Then, if their prayers are answered, the right politicians will be elected and the reverends will get busted by federal agents.

Today, more than 30 ministers from across the country plan to purposefully violate federal law by endorsing political candidates during their church sermons.

But under a federal law that has existed for more than 50 years, religious organizations cannot engage in political speech while they also accept deductible contributions. If they do, they risk losing their tax-exempt status.

Today's protest is being organized by the Scottsdale-based Alliance Defense Fund, an advocacy group made up of Christian lawyers. (Which sounds like an oxymoron on the scale of "business ethics," "airline food" and "adult male.")

Oh, that's cute. "Christian lawyer" is an oxymoron because everyone knows that lawyers are scumbags while Christians are the very definition of goodness and morality. Gag me...

If Montini knew how to use "the Google", it would have taken him less than ten seconds to discover that the Alliance Defense Fund is an extreme-right dominionist group associated with just about all the leading figures of the fundamentalist right, and has been at the forefront of bashing gays and riling up the useful idiots against the nonexistent "War on Christmas" (TM, Faux News). Somehow I don't think too many of its affiliated preachers will be touting Obama today, though of course that's beside the point. The principle is clear: put up (tax payments) or shut up!

Montini looks favorably on the argument that requiring churches to keep out of partisan politics if they want to keep their tax-exempt status is an attack on free speech: "I can't imagine how a pastor could adhere to biblical theology and endorse any political candidate, but they should be allowed to try without fear of losing their tax-exempt status." (Emphasis in original.) I guess Montini is less familiar with another part of the First Amendment: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion."

I can't see why Montini doesn't understand that freedom from tax is not a basic right but a huge special privilege given to religious bodies. Nothing in the Constitution requires it (let alone the many other breaks and exemptions churches routinely get from zoning laws, business licencing requirements, etc. etc.), and it would be perfectly legitimate to tax the churches as long as they are treated equally. But when the churches are freed of the tax burden, everyone else has to take up the slack. Congress may not be establishing a particular religion, but it is supporting religion in general with my tax dollars. This is unacceptable, and doubly so when the churches turn around and violate the minimal and reasonable conditions on this unique privilege granted to them.

The religious-industrial complex is the most profitable one in the US today. Think of the millions of poor saps tithing hard-earned money that they can ill afford to part with, and instead of getting even a word of thanks, they are continually exhorted to tithe harder and even double-tithe. Where does the money go? For gaudy megachurches, lavish mansions, executive jets and other toys for the super-rich religious-right leaders. Read the recent book Falwell Inc. for an example of how these holy-roller parasites live high on the hog by selling snake oil. And they don't pay a penny of tax on this money! But even that isn't enough for them, they want totally untrammelled power and a free rein for their partisan politicking! They want to take from Caesar instead of rendering unto him, and they want to pick their own Caesar in the first place! What jaw-dropping arrogance and hubris.

Montini says: "The restrictions are a farce. Not only because they fly in the face of the Constitution, but also because they don't work." By the same "logic", we shouldn't try to enforce laws against murder because there will always be murders. It's pretty clear who exactly is "flying in the face of the Constitution."