No More Mr. Nice Guy!

Those Founding Fathers were some irreligious mothers!

How well do you know your Founding Fathers? See if you can match each of the quotes below with who wrote or said it.

1. "I hope ever to see America in the foremost nations in examples of justice and liberality." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
2. "When a religion is good, I conceive that it will support itself; and when it does not support itself, and God does not take care to support it, so that its professors are obliged to call for help of the civil power, 'tis a sign, I apprehend, of its being a bad one." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
3. "The day will come when the mystical generation of Jesus, by the supreme being as his father in the womb of a virgin will be classed with the fable of the generation of Minerva in the brain of Jupiter." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
4. "During almost fifteen centuries has the legal establishment of Christianity been on trial. What has been its fruits? More or less, in all places, pride and indolence in the clergy; ignorance and servility in the laity; in both, superstition, bigotry and persecution." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
5. "What influence in fact have ecclesiastical establishments had on Civil Society? In some instances they have been seen to erect a spiritual tyranny on the ruins of the Civil authority; in many instances they have been seen upholding the thrones of political tyranny: in no instance have they been seen the guardians of the liberties of the people." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
6. "I mix religion with politics as little as possible" Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
7. "You judge truly that I am not afraid of the priests. They have tried upon my all their various batteries, of pious whining, hypocritical canting, lying and slandering, without being able to give me one moment of pain." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams
8. "Question with boldness even the existence of a god." Who said it?George WashingtonBenjamin FranklinThomas JeffersonJames MadisonJohn Adams

This little quiz is by way of introducing my latest book recommendation, Moral Minority: Our Skeptical Founding Fathers by Brooke Allen. This should be mandatory reading for every bloviating buffoon who claims that the United States was founded as a Christian nation. The Founding Fathers were very much products of the Enlightenment, and regarded religion as, at best, a distraction from what should be the concerns of civil government, and at worst a source of ignorance, backwardness and violence. They were hardly alone; less than 17% of the population was "churched" in the early years of the republic, and the southern states had a reputation for being tolerant and liberal in matters of religion, unlike the puritan New Englanders.

Alas, the promise of a secular republic guided by intelligent, educated and non-superstitious leaders was quickly imperilled by the "Great Awakening" of the early 19th century, when reason and tolerance went to sleep and religious fanaticism triumphed. (Actually, this was the "Second Great Awakening", the first having erupted in the 1740's. We still haven't recovered from the second one, and now George Bush Junior is blathering about a third one. Zeus help us all.)

One consequence is that the religious right of the day co-opted the Founding Fathers, to the extent that virtually everything the general public knows about them is false. For example, the stories of George Washington and the cherry tree, "I cannot tell a lie", praying in the woods at Valley Forge etc. were the invention of Parson Weems, a scurrilous myth-monger whose account of the death of Washington is hilarious to a modern reader with its great steaming piles of religiosity and sentimental schlock. I can only give you a taste here:

Feeling that the silver chord of life is loosing, and that his spirit is ready to quit her old companion the body, he extends himself on his bed - closes his eyes for the last time, with his own hands - folds his arms decently on his breast, then breathing out "Father of mercies! take me to thyself," - he fell asleep.

Swift on angels' wings the brightening saint ascended; while voices more than human were heard (in Fancy's ear) warbling through the happy regions, and hymning the great procession towards the gates of heaven. His glorious coming was seen far off, and myriads of mighty angels hastened forth, with golden harps, to welcome the honored stranger.

But the campaign to destroy church-state separation, the Founding Fathers' most precious gift to us, is no laughing matter as it grows ever more blatant in its lies, distortions, dishonesty and aggressiveness. Ultra-powerful and bottomless-pocketed fundo-dominionist groups subject us to an overwhelming barrage of lies about our Constitution, for example that it creates a one-dimensional wall (sic) which allows the church (i.e. the Southern Baptist Church) to control the state but not vice versa. And now that the dominionists have a monopoly on political power in the US, they enjoy an extraordinarily privileged position that makes a mockery of the cornerstone of this nation and would have the Founding Fathers spinning in their graves.

As I've said over and over again, the US has the worst educational system in the developed world, and the power elite likes it that way, because ignorant citizens can be manipulated with pathetic ease. We all have an obligation to educate ourselves about our Constitution and its bedrock principle, strict church-state separation, and to do all in our power to prevent the religious-right lunatics from turning this country into a theocratic hell-hole. Otherwise we might as well break out the burkas right now...